We have discussed the ideology of the term ‘Success’ having different definitions to each person since I started the “What do we mean by Success?” series, which we are putting that theory to the test. This week’s blog, written by Tom Jauncey, the Director of Nautilus Marketing, investigates ‘Success’ from a business approach and gives us an insight into what Success means to Tom!
Read more
Hello and Welcome to Sweeney’s Blogs!
Today’s blog is the secong blog in our Time to Talk series and is all about The Reality of Grief. The idea for the blog and the blog itself came from a new guest writer on the page Kyra Fehrman. It is Kyra’s first blog on the page so let us know what you think and if you want to see more from Kyra! Hope you all enjoy the blog and learn something new about grief!
January only has 31 days, however, for me, it felt more like 100. January was a long and arduous time, certainly one you wouldn’t qualify as the best start to 2020. We all have days where everything seems to go wrong, where the world seems to be fighting against you, creating misery and chaos wherever you go and in whatever you do. For me the battle seemed to last the whole month with my grandmother going into hospital on the 1st and then finally succumbing to pneumonia and end stage COPD on the 9th January and her funeral was the 28th January.
Grief is not fun I am sure no one needs to tell you that but what they don’t tell you is that the five stages of grief isn’t as easy as going from one to two to three etc. It is a stressful process, one minute you’re in shock, numb to the core unable to process the reality of your situation, next you jump to anger and you end up not knowing what is going on and what to do with yourself. You play the blame game take it out on those around you maybe after that you cry, sob your heart out over the loss.
What no one tells us is that you can be stuck in that vicious circle for a long time, my partner lost his mother almost ten years ago and he is still grieving, stuck in the numb phase unable to speak about it or face the reality of his loss. My point here is that you never stop grieving and it will have a major impact upon your mental health, before January I was a different person with a different mindset.
Now after losing my grandmother I am seeing the world in a different light, faced with my mortality and the idea of my loved ones dying eventually has forced me to appreciate all the time I have with them. It is hard to talk about these things and a lot of people may say to you to just “move on” that they are in a better place and while the sentiment is nice it invalidates your feelings. You have every right to grieve your loved one and regardless of if they are in a better place or not they are not here with you, they are gone and all those things you would want to tell them, the jokes, the memories you’d want to remind them of you can’t.
Mental Health is a major topic nowadays with a rise in suicides, people taking anti-depressants and antipsychotics, we are in a mental health crisis and this post aims to encourage people to speak up. No matter how silly it may seem there is always someone out there who is willing to listen. If you are grieving a loved one and think life is not worth it anymore just remember this, they loved you with every fibre of their being don’t give up because they don’t want you joining them any time soon.
It is paramount that you look after yourself during these difficult times, hard as that may be, it’s crucial to remember that life will always go on and no matter what you will survive. You are strong enough to endure this pain help and support is out there. A light can be shone in even the darkest of places. Below are numbers and websites for Mental Health organisations.
Thank you all for reading! We hope that you have enjoyed today’s blog and have learned something new about grief! What do you think of today’s blog? Would you like to see more of Kyra’s blogs on the page? Has grief ever impacted on your life? How did you manage it? Let us know what you think in the comments below or on our facebook page.
Sweeney’s Blogs
Any money donated here will be greatly appreciated and will be put back into the page!
£5.00
James
Do you have an idea for a blog or maybe even a blog series that you want to share? Do you want to write for a page but not have the hassle of setting a page up? Do you want to make a difference in someone’s life? Here at Sweeney’s Blogs, we have the offer for you, become a guest blogger and start making a difference straight away!
Hello and Welcome to Sweeney’s Blogs!
Today’s blog is all about guest blogs. I am looking for people to write blogs for the page coming into the new year. Blogging can be a really great way to share stories and experiences as well as create a community in which people can communicate openly with each other. Whether you want to write one or one hundred posts, you are more than welcome to write for the page!
In regards to what to write about, you can write about absolutely anything. The perks of owning a page aimed at Stuttering, Stress and Mental health is that it links to everything and anything in life! If you have an idea for a post that you want to write yourself or that you want me to write then let me know! I’m always happy to talk through ideas and blog possibilities!
The only thing I do say is that I obviously read through each post before it is published. This is just to make sure that it flows and that there are no mistakes. I will more than likely put it through Grammarly too but there’s no problem there! If for some reason a change would need to be made then I would check with you first before publishing!
It’s a really great process to be a part of and the blogs can be as long or short as you want, what’s not to like! Let me know if you’re interested and we’ll discuss it further!
Sweeney’s Blogs
Any money donated here will be put back into the business. This can be through marketing campaigns, upgrades to plans or for setting up future events!
£5.00
James
Hello and Welcome to Sweeney’s Blogs!
Today’s blog is a guest blog written by one of our readers, Rebecca Sutcliffe-Major! The blog is about how being a mother can be a very hard job and to never give up. You may make mistakes from time to time but it is all a learning process. Remember the job you are doing, the value it brings to the world and try not to beat yourself up if things seem to go wrong. Hope you enjoy the blog!
One thing that all mums have in common and most don’t even know it. We all at some point are adamant we are ‘mumming’ wrong. I worked full time in management to help support my family while trying to further my education to better our future. The response I got from others “don’t you miss your kids?”, “shouldn’t you be spending more time with your family?”. Then when I gave up working so I could concentrate on my children and my education I had comments such as “don’t you think you should work to help out your husband?”, “Are you setting the right example for your kids by not working?”. All the while inside my head I’m screaming “ARE YOU SERIOUS!”.
On the outside, I look like I have it all together, on the inside I am full of self-doubt and anxiety. When I worked, I was in smart clothes, makeup done, hair done, nails done but I worried about my kids missing me. Now I’m out of work, I look neglected and I’m worrying that I am not occupying the kids time in the right way like they had a nursery. There is no end!
I was adamant that once I finished work, I would have an amazing routine and do crafts with them, make home-cooked meals and basically be an amazing mum. Oh boy, was I wrong!!
After the first week at home, I was so very tired. ‘Mumming’ full time is hard work. Running after a 1 year old and school runs really take it out of you. Even the little things were hard.
Something as simple as putting down the baby for a nap, then I can shower or clean or do the washing. NO! Baby decided that napping was beneath her and spend 30 minutes singing and shouting before I gave up and brought her back downstairs. But it’s ok… I spent that 30 minutes cleaning the living room, I was productive!
The baby was then in the living room eating a banana while watching tv, coolies… I’ll clean the kitchen. NO! Baby decided that playing on her own while watching tv was not acceptable. I walked into my living room and it was trashed. The one-year-old hooligan had thrown toys, cushions, banana peel everywhere. Clearly, she’s not to be left alone.
Next thought…. Why don’t you help mummy!!! NO! She proceeded to pull things out of the washer before I could fill it and set it going. Then she got distracted …. I managed to put the washer on, turned around…… oh hell, the baby is playing with the cat bowls ….. biscuits and water all over my kitchen.
Bath time …. Ended with both me and my bathroom soaked. We were now late for the school run. I turn up at school soaked and looking like id been dragged through a hedge backwards. Get the kids home my eldest says “mummy why is it so messy?” REALLY KID!!
I managed to get them to play nicely together while I tried to tidy around them, then moved into the kitchen to sort out the washing (which as it turned out I set off gong without putting in any washing powder or fabric softener). Back to the living room……trashed. My husband comes home ….. “what happened here?” I’m stood there, baby in one arm and wet unwashed washing in the other, surrounded by toys. It actually looked like I had done nothing all day.
I felt like such a failure. I can run a business, manage staff, deal with customers, do the rotas, create strategic plans. But I couldn’t keep my cool with the kids, I couldn’t keep my house in check, I couldn’t have tea ready for when my husband got home. I was in jeans and a hoodie all day, no make-up, hair a mess. I looked nothing like I was used to. All these goals that I was adamant I could do, turns out I couldn’t. I thought when I gave up work I would have less stress which would lower my anxiety and make me a happier person to be around. This went on for weeks. I made myself feel worse with all the bad thoughts. My depression spiralled downwards; I could feel myself loosing. I went back to the doctors thinking I was getting too bad and I cried a lot.
Then it occurred to me, who cares. My children are happy, fed and well looked after. Who cares if my house is a mess, who cares if I am a mess, who cares if my husband has the opinion that I am slowly going insane after watch re-runs of Pepper Pig all day! The only person who actually cared about it was me. My husband and my kids want me healthy and happy, that’s it!
Once I stopped putting all the extra pressure on myself, I got into a rhythm. School run, nap, clean, lunch, play, school run, tea. Don’t get me wrong, it is not easy and most days the cleaning won’t get done until the kids are in bed. My house is nowhere up to the standards that it used to be and I still don’t always have time to sort myself out.
Without putting standards on myself I started to feel better. I was smiling more and laughing more. I’m still struggling with inner demons and I will be for a while. There is no quick fix and some days the only thing that gets me through the day is a cheeky smile from a one-year-old hooligan.
The NHS states that 1 in 10 people have clinical depression[1]. In 2018 Forth conducted a survey which stated that 42% of women admitted that they were ‘too stressed’[2].
The message I want to get out there is ‘mumming’ is hard, you are not overreacting, you are not worthless, and you may have days when you feel like a failure but it’s ok. We are all feeling that way. You are not alone. You may make some mistakes but it is all part of the process. Remember we can only learn from a mistake if we actually make it in the first place.
[1] NHS, Clinical depression <https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/clinical-depression/>
[2] Forth. Great Britain and Stress – How bad is it and why is it happening?<https://www.forthwithlife.co.uk/blog/great-britain-and-stress/>
Thanks for reading! What do you all think? Would you like to see some more blogs by Rebecca? Let me know your answers to the above questions and any other questions or queries you have either in the comments below or via our Facebook page!
Thanks for reading and I hope you have a great day!
Sweeney’s Blogs
Any money donated here will be put back into the business. This can be through marketing campaigns, upgrades to plans or for setting up future events!
£5.00
James
Hello and Welcome to Sweeney’s Blogs!
I am looking for a new writer for the page. What I am looking for from a writer is either a few individual blogs or for them to write a series of blogs that I can publish. There will be no salary for the blog however you will be given full credit on each post you do. The blogs can be about anything as long as we can find a link back to Stuttering, Stress or Mental Health.
Everyone is welcome to write a few blogs for the page, there is no restriction on who can write and who cannot. I will read through each post before it is published just to make sure it is okay and reads well but it is very unlikely that I will actually make changes to someone’s work. If I do see any changes that need to be made then I would discuss it with you beforehand.
To apply for the blog writing job/position simply fill out the form below or you can complete the form on our Facebook page if that is what you prefer. I will try to look through all of the forms ASAP. If you do not want to become a fully-fledged writer for the page that is also completely fine. If you just want to write one or two blogs or one every so often then that is great as well, as long as you let me know!
The form on this page is going to be really easy to fill out. The name and email address fields take a few seconds to fill out then we get to the comments part. In the comments section try and write about why you want to write a few blogs/ what sort of blogs you want to do and any experience you have in writing. Experience isn’t needed to be a blogger on my page but it is nice to see some work beforehand if there is any available.
Thanks for reading and I will see you all in the next blog! If you are interested in being a blogger for the page please fill out the form below!
Hello and Welcome to Sweeney’s Blogs!
Today’s blog is going to talk about Guest blogs as well as a few updates coming to the page. There have not been any guest blogs on my page yet but I am hoping to start publishing a few in the future. Guest blogs allow people other than myself the chance to post content on my page. Guest blogs are something that I am trying to encourage more now and I hope to see a few in the upcoming weeks.
There are lots of different ways that a guest blog can work. The first way is if get in touch with me about an idea for a blog that you want to see in the future. If you just want to give me the idea and then allow me to write the blog around that then you will be credited in the blog itself and I will do my best to work around the idea that has been presented.
Another way that guest blogs can work is if you write the blog by yourself and then send it to me. If people choose to do this way then I will just scan through the blog quickly to see if it is alright then will publish it as soon as I can. When scanning through the blog I will aim not to change anything, however, if there is a part that doesn’t look right or if it could be reworded a bit then I would get in touch with you and discuss that first.
I am also more than happy to sit down and work on writing a blog alongside someone if they have an idea and are not quite sure how to write it. This can be done in a number of ways. We could discuss the idea in depth and then develop a plan for you to write the blog off, you could make a plan and I could write the blog or we could just write the blog step by step ensuring that we are both happy at the end of each stage.
As you can see from some of the ideas above there are lots of ways that a guest blog can be written. If anyone does have an idea for a blog then please get in touch with me. You will be given credit for your work and if you want to could become a regular writer on the page.
During the past few weeks, I have been working on updating the sidebar for the page. I have reorganised the way that the sections are presented into an order that I think is good. There is a way for me to install a chat room like function for the page that will allow everyone to communicate with each other like they are in a chatroom. I wasn’t sure whether to add this function in yet or wait for a better time in the future. What does everyone think? Should I include the chatroom now or wait a little bit?
As well as this there will be some changes to the series that I write on the page soon. I will be pausing the Male Mental Health series after one or two more blogs and then starting up a new series talking about Stuttering in Mainstream Media. I want the Male Mental Health blogs to stay fresh and to have a real meaning behind them which is why I am putting the series on hold for a little while. I do not want to just write blogs for the sake of it as the blogs have to have a purpose and have to have a meaning behind them or else there is no point in even writing them.
I will probably be starting the Stuttering in Mainstream Media series in around two to three weeks, dependent on when the Male Mental Health series finishes. I am not sure on the length of the series yet as there are a lot of different things that I can talk about so we can discuss that in the future when the series is well underway.
I believe that is all I want to talk about in today’s blog! Thank you all for reading and I hope you enjoyed! Today’s blog was a bit different from my usual work but I do aim to do update blogs every so often. I am thinking of launching a new advertising campaign for the site too but am not quite sure how to do it. Let me know what type of advertising you think is best!
Thank you all for reading,
Sweeney’s Blogs
Any money donated here will be put back into the business. This can be through marketing campaigns, upgrades to plans or for setting up future events!
£5.00
James Sweeney
Sweeney's Blogs 